Pensively Yours
An sms.
A long thought process to reply. "Don't say sorry; you have nothing to be sorry about, you did nothing wrong." There was no hiding behind the screens on the stand I am taking.
The response came quickly. I felt the other party replied in spite, even using christian words to "threaten" me.
Not wanting to blow up my emotions, I pushed the buttons and sent a light-hearted message.
The tone dropped to a regular, pragmatic tone and I had to pick it up again in closure.
I felt I made myself a villian; But I have to be blunt. If there are concerns for them, where's my portion?
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Started an MSN conversation. I had to clarify the comment and the tone in the sms.
Deeper into the chat, gushes of emotions ran the discussion overtime.
I was brought back to the time when I was hurt deeply; when disappointments and recognition never met. And as I've heard, are still not met.
There were outpourings after outpourings. The eyes welled, and then trickled.
It's a clearer picture now; time has washed away the murky water and I can see clearly the reason why I faded away from them.
I was the singular unit. There was never the "group".
Just like when Jesus calmed the storm, I reached His peaceful ocean at the end of the talk.
It was a good heart-to-heart talk. And more so because every emotions was allow to reach its audience with nothing in between. (It used to be kept in the mind closet 80% of the time; they took all of the remainders. That's probably why to them, I was thought of as the quiet person.)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Yes, anyway, I've move on. It is important that I will grow when I moved.
God, I can't do it alone. Be my guide. Be my light.
I need you.
A long thought process to reply. "Don't say sorry; you have nothing to be sorry about, you did nothing wrong." There was no hiding behind the screens on the stand I am taking.
The response came quickly. I felt the other party replied in spite, even using christian words to "threaten" me.
Not wanting to blow up my emotions, I pushed the buttons and sent a light-hearted message.
The tone dropped to a regular, pragmatic tone and I had to pick it up again in closure.
I felt I made myself a villian; But I have to be blunt. If there are concerns for them, where's my portion?
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Started an MSN conversation. I had to clarify the comment and the tone in the sms.
Deeper into the chat, gushes of emotions ran the discussion overtime.
I was brought back to the time when I was hurt deeply; when disappointments and recognition never met. And as I've heard, are still not met.
There were outpourings after outpourings. The eyes welled, and then trickled.
It's a clearer picture now; time has washed away the murky water and I can see clearly the reason why I faded away from them.
I was the singular unit. There was never the "group".
Just like when Jesus calmed the storm, I reached His peaceful ocean at the end of the talk.
It was a good heart-to-heart talk. And more so because every emotions was allow to reach its audience with nothing in between. (It used to be kept in the mind closet 80% of the time; they took all of the remainders. That's probably why to them, I was thought of as the quiet person.)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Yes, anyway, I've move on. It is important that I will grow when I moved.
God, I can't do it alone. Be my guide. Be my light.
I need you.
Labels: Christianity, church, Friendship, knowing when, spirituality
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