Of A Funeral , A Wedding And A Single Adult

This is one bizarre week.

One of my friend was to conduct her customary wedding on the 30th of this month. However, bthe doctor had told the family that he will not last very long. Being the very Chinese traditional girl she is, and wanting to let her father see her get married before he passed on, both she and her husband decided to bring forward the wedding date.

Some of us met up with her last friday just to catch up and stuffs, and to do some small discussion about the wedding. Last night, we got an sms from her. Her dad had passed away peacefully last night. The funeral will be on this Thursday.

The wedding will still carry on as usual this Saturday. The wake began yesterday. I just came back from the wake. Her family looked alright. Mother and 4 daughters. I guess having gone through may rounds of "could've beens", they were pretty much prepared for it, and weren't visibly emotional. Not to say that they were not sad, but I guess they had knew it was coming, probably have had their hearts sorrowed many times before to know that today is the day that they could lay down their sorrows once and for all.

The group of us had a great time catching up with one another (that's what people do nowadays to catch up, strangely, in weddings and funerals). They served their visitors with a very traditional dinner:



Remember karlee kuay (curry chicken), and kong bar bao (braised pork bun)? These are traditional snacks served in Chinese funerals. We grew up eating these stuffs. I had to take a picture to remember such things. Nowadays, most funerals come with more "classier" buffet, but I guess being nostalgic, I still think traditional stuffs are better.

Then, there were more chatter before we head down to Happy Valley for supper. J did not eat the food at the wake (some thing he believed he shouldn't do at funerals) and we continued from there. Lotsa chatter, lotas laughter.

And I broke my strict regime of no food after 8pm :( After we parted, I decided I need to walked home for the sake of my super-full stomach. Upon arrival and done with my cleaning up, I quickly popped 2 capsules of enzyme tablets. Now I feel much better.

I don't want a protruding tummy to accompany me to the wedding! It's this Saturday. And I have a company dinner this Friday! Gosh. I wonder how will I get by. I really need to watch it for the next couple of days. Really watch it.

So there you go. A funeral. A wedding. All in the same week. In the same family.

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Somehow, during an MSN conversation this afternoon, the topic drifted to my singlehood. I started to write really depressive and negative liners. Like even a leader of a nearby country got remarried within 2 years after he was widowed, and I didn't even have an anyone in between. Like in 30 years on, I will die alone in an empty apartment; or if I get runned down by a car or struck by lightning this instant, I will die a single person; and that I am not gifted with celibracy, more like stucked with singlehood.

And the self-condemnation went on and on and on...

I can't help it. I find no evidence that "God will provide". I'm sorry, it doesn't look like it is happening, and I have lost my ability to hope for such things. I will just put on a brave front and pretend it didn't matter.

Because telling them means rubbing more salt. Even my mother, who has spared me on such things for the longest time, has been asking me to go get someone. Like HELLO... who wants to date a giant Christian woman? I told her bluntly that nobody-wants-me repeatedly when she brought the topic up again and again.

So yep, that's it.