Because If It Is The Best
Duh, there's no GA tonight. Good Ol' channel 5 does what it always do best. Repeating shows. So in place of GA, they re-run the match between Italy and France. I am like.. Super Duh. Why do they always like to take out GA and run some stupid last minute programme? Why on Mondays? Cos there's no commerical money to earn in GA (no sponsors) , and so it's a convenient sacrificial lamb?
Bleahz.
So there will be no write up on GA. And I can jolly well sleep early tonight. But not without documenting my thoughts.
At the cool down stretching session of my aerobics class, flurry of thoughts came to mind. First I thought of Mr D., and was harping on the possibility that somehow, we could meet again. "Maybe he will offer to ask er-jie to give me his number, since I didn't get his namecard even when I asked for it...; Maybe er-jie could connect R. and then him to come on MSN with us, with me...; Maybe, we could have another of this kinda outing again... SOON...."
Then, the thoughts drifted to how similar Mr D is to the man in Feb. I thought maybe I should write a poem of some sort and call it "man in Feb". Mind goes back to compare the two again. The old feelings that have been swept away after February, somehow blew into my memory once again... So much so I didn't follow some of the cool down exercise instructions by the instructor.
Tinge of sadness were ready to well up. But it wasn't so bad that i need to sniff. It joins the heaviness of heart, that was slowly taking weight, pulling the thoughts in my mind down that took my concentration away... Down... Down... Down...
After class, as usual, I walk pass the park. The memory, meshed with the heaviness, revive again in my tired body. I have to sit down and sort this out, for I don't want to bring this back home with me. . Found a place to sit down to sort out the mental mess. Prayed that God will help me to put the bad memory behind and to continue afresh. I told myself that whatever happens, I am going to be myself. I am not going to go into drastic changes just to impress someone.
Then, I remembered a personal conviction I made earlier. Yep, I will wait, I do not need to push for an opportunity.
Because if it is the best for me, it will happen to me.
Bleahz.
So there will be no write up on GA. And I can jolly well sleep early tonight. But not without documenting my thoughts.
At the cool down stretching session of my aerobics class, flurry of thoughts came to mind. First I thought of Mr D., and was harping on the possibility that somehow, we could meet again. "Maybe he will offer to ask er-jie to give me his number, since I didn't get his namecard even when I asked for it...; Maybe er-jie could connect R. and then him to come on MSN with us, with me...; Maybe, we could have another of this kinda outing again... SOON...."
Then, the thoughts drifted to how similar Mr D is to the man in Feb. I thought maybe I should write a poem of some sort and call it "man in Feb". Mind goes back to compare the two again. The old feelings that have been swept away after February, somehow blew into my memory once again... So much so I didn't follow some of the cool down exercise instructions by the instructor.
Tinge of sadness were ready to well up. But it wasn't so bad that i need to sniff. It joins the heaviness of heart, that was slowly taking weight, pulling the thoughts in my mind down that took my concentration away... Down... Down... Down...
After class, as usual, I walk pass the park. The memory, meshed with the heaviness, revive again in my tired body. I have to sit down and sort this out, for I don't want to bring this back home with me. . Found a place to sit down to sort out the mental mess. Prayed that God will help me to put the bad memory behind and to continue afresh. I told myself that whatever happens, I am going to be myself. I am not going to go into drastic changes just to impress someone.
Then, I remembered a personal conviction I made earlier. Yep, I will wait, I do not need to push for an opportunity.
Because if it is the best for me, it will happen to me.
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