Applying And Appalling...
Today before, during and after church, I thought about my expectations of people. And wondering if my expectations are getting higher and higher, so much so that it is not very possible that they are all fullfilled by people around me, hence I end up being miserable because these expectations are not met.
As I reflect on my expectations, it seems to me that they are indeed getting higher and higher. Sometimes, I think my requirements are much more impossible to achieve as the years go by. My expectations of "friendship" especially, has gone up alot. My expectation of the church too, has dramatically changed for the past few years.
Which is why I have been so miserable. Either I lower my expectations, or have no expectations on people at all.
Applying that on the church seemed a very tough thing to do. How can I not have expectations of the church? I just cannot reconcile that.
With friendships, maybe is easier. I should've known, being burnt so many times. Still, I expect the best to come out of it. Oh well.
The word that come strongly to me is that I need to manage my expectations. Only then will I be able to feel less miserable.
Still, I think the toughest one is to manage my expectations of the church. I have yielded so much and taken in so much without expecting anything. And look what it has done to me. I was destroyed, drained and burnt.
The answer is obvious. But I don't want to yield.
Part 2 of this >>
- - - - - - - - - - -
Yucks, today on the train to the east, saw a girl about 15 years old secretly eating in train with her brother, I think. That is still ok, she was wearling long slacks and out of a sudden, she pulled it up to check something on her leg, and gee... The amount of leg hair...
Then another girl came in with a guy. I do not know if he is her bf or is he gay. She leaned very closed to him, snapping pictures with her phone. But he was rather nonchalent at her gestures. Hmmm...
- - - - - - - - - - -
Today was my worst shopping trip. Went down to Takashimaya to see if I could get a pair of trainers with my vouchers. The design don't have my size, and they have limited brands.. ARGH.
Took a train down to Suntec City, hoping that WHY PAY MORE has trainers. They only stock running shoes. ARGH.
Guess I have to glue the old pair of shoes for tomorrow's aerobics class.
ARGH.
As I reflect on my expectations, it seems to me that they are indeed getting higher and higher. Sometimes, I think my requirements are much more impossible to achieve as the years go by. My expectations of "friendship" especially, has gone up alot. My expectation of the church too, has dramatically changed for the past few years.
Which is why I have been so miserable. Either I lower my expectations, or have no expectations on people at all.
Applying that on the church seemed a very tough thing to do. How can I not have expectations of the church? I just cannot reconcile that.
With friendships, maybe is easier. I should've known, being burnt so many times. Still, I expect the best to come out of it. Oh well.
The word that come strongly to me is that I need to manage my expectations. Only then will I be able to feel less miserable.
Still, I think the toughest one is to manage my expectations of the church. I have yielded so much and taken in so much without expecting anything. And look what it has done to me. I was destroyed, drained and burnt.
The answer is obvious. But I don't want to yield.
Part 2 of this >>
- - - - - - - - - - -
Yucks, today on the train to the east, saw a girl about 15 years old secretly eating in train with her brother, I think. That is still ok, she was wearling long slacks and out of a sudden, she pulled it up to check something on her leg, and gee... The amount of leg hair...
Then another girl came in with a guy. I do not know if he is her bf or is he gay. She leaned very closed to him, snapping pictures with her phone. But he was rather nonchalent at her gestures. Hmmm...
- - - - - - - - - - -
Today was my worst shopping trip. Went down to Takashimaya to see if I could get a pair of trainers with my vouchers. The design don't have my size, and they have limited brands.. ARGH.
Took a train down to Suntec City, hoping that WHY PAY MORE has trainers. They only stock running shoes. ARGH.
Guess I have to glue the old pair of shoes for tomorrow's aerobics class.
ARGH.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home